An Introvert Spills His Guts­

Our family business had grown quite sizeable by the time I was a teenager. My dad’s name was all ove­r town, literally, on cars’ license plate frames, in weekly newspaper, radio, and TV ads and on the signs and exteriors of some of Salt Lake’s most successful auto dealerships, which my parents owned.

Our family grew even more conspicuous after my mom and dad bought a professional basketball team.

I didn’t recognize it at the time, but as our family’s visibility in the community increased, my parents’ efforts to safeguard our privacy increased along with it. We lived in a private community. We weren’t listed in the phone book, and you couldn’t get our address by calling directory assistance. We were the first family I knew that had caller ID, and even after it became quite popular we were the only family I knew whose number was blocked.

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My dad often said, “The only stupid question is an unasked question,” but I’m not sure he ever heard the questions kids asked me at school. Things like, “What’s it like to see your dad on TV all the time?”, “Do the Jazz players come over to your house for dinner?” or “Can I have a car?”

It wasn’t until after I’d left high school that I heard my dad’s advice to try responding to the ever popular, “Will you give me free Jazz tickets?” with, “I’ll be glad to give you free Jazz tickets… when the players agree to play for free.”

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The point of telling you all this is to let you know that it doesn’t come naturally for me to share my thoughts, feelings and experiences online as I have been for the past twelve days in this blog. In addition to being an introvert by nature, I have inherited my parents’ tendency to be private. Maybe it’s due to all the inane questions I was so often asked growing up.

Or it could be that I understand that once something’s published online, it’s out there forever. And who hasn’t regretted something they once said?

My reluctance to share might stem from the fact that I’m a perfectionist and I know that eventually you’ll find a typo, more than a few poorly worded sentences, or any number of grammatical offenses. Or you might be the kind of reader who finds a typo and makes a point to let me know. Or worse yet, you might be the kind of reader who finds a typo and doesn’t let me know.

In any case, when I began this post, what I wanted to share is that blogging like this feels a bit upstream to me, but I’m grateful to you for reading my blog. I particularly want to thank those of you who have shared with me your comments, suggested links, videos, or asked questions. I am humbled by everyone who has shared with me the ways that things I have said have touched or lifted you. I am also grateful to everyone who has shared my blog with someone else.

I made a New Year’s resolution to post online every day in order to force myself outside my comfort zone. Thank you to everyone who has read what I’ve written- you’ve helped me to see that it’s nice out here.